What Goes Bump In The Dark?
by Grin Reaper
Summary: .......RR......
1. Chapter 1

It was a lovely day at the institute of the criminally insane...uhhh I mean gifted youngsters. However as the evening neared and the sun descended into the soft rich golden and auburn hues, some anti-mutant jerks had the guts to mess with super power wielding, hormone driven and not to forget 'fighting to save their asses' super heroes. With baseball bats no less! Yes the Bayville hockey team jocks had taken it upon themselves to cause destruction to the land and property of Xavier's' on a fine Saturday evening no less. Couldn't they just have gone out with their sluttish cheerleading girlfriends and saved themselves a world of bruises? Well of course not! This was a wayyy better past time. Getting your butt kicked and handed to you on a silver platter. Obviously they weren't the smartest people alive. Not by a long shot. Not only did they NOT have super powers but they didn't have any gray matter either.

After a while when they had had enough of beating the shit out of the helpless assailants and relieved their respective stresses and aggravations, the _peaceful_ X-Men finally retreated into the mansion to resume their Saturday evening plans. Unbeknownst to them the battered and bruised weren't about to just walk away without at least regaining a little bit of their lost dignity. So they did the **most** horrible and conniving thing that anyone could ever think of…. they cut off the power cables to the Xavier mansion. And feeling just a little bit better, and figuring that no one would **ever** catch on to their little black deed, they went in search for their sluttish cheerleading girlfriends… and collapsed onto the road outside of the mansion due to the countless injuries they had brought unto themselves where a big black truck caught onto them. The irony of it was lost on them as they were greeted with the same faith as the countless bugs on the windshield.

**Anyway…back at the mansion**

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO………………..I've gone blind!"

"Uhhh Scott…it's only a power failure…"

"O right…. So you wanna go back to making out now or u wanna move on to more….'better' things?"

"What do you mean 'better' things? Like candy?"

"Jean don't be so immature. You know I mean sex."

Wild laughter followed by:

"I'm Jamie! Jean left right after you started screaming. I do a good impression though, right? You can give me sex though. I love presents!"

Hearing that, Scott collapsed into a dead faint never knowing that he had just gotten a spoonful of the endless 'mishaps' that the author was gonna make the residents suffer…


	2. What's up with that?

"Chuck what do ya think happened?" Asked the resident Canadian Wolverine.

"After a lot of contemplation I've come to only one logical conclusion as to why this tragedy befell us. It's Magneto! O yea…. only he could do something as diabolical as this! Why o why did it have to be us? What did we ever…." The Professor started screaming and bawling dramatically.

"Sooo you think the fight the X-men had with those jocks earlier could have absolutely nothing to do with this?" Logan cut in through the Professor's hysteria.

"… my beautiful lovely scalp…how in the world am I going to polish it if there's no light? What will become of us?…why is fate so cruel….?…."

"Okkk… I think I'll just go now." And with that a very perturbed Logan exited the Professor's office leaving a melodramatic, screaming and down right scary bald man in his wake.

-------------------------------------------------

"Oooo Bobby you're sooo good…."

"Umhmm…"

"Not there…. not there…. oww…."

"Just relax, I've done this before."

"Bobby you're the best man! You seem wayyy experienced!"

"Practice makes perfect, Ray…."

"Move a little lower. O yea…. that's better."

"Let's get to it, eh?"

"Not so fast…I think we might need more room to pull this off."

"EWWWW you guys! For heaven's sake this is so disturbing!" Yelled Jubilee who had just walked in on a very _apparently_ gay moment.

"And Bobby! I thought WE had something going! What the hell happened to THAT? Am I not good enough for you? Why did you have to go do do… uhhh I gotta go puke"

"What's her problem?" said Ray after Jubilee had bolted from the room.

"She's just jealous I didn't choose her as my partner for this. But seriously, it's so not a chick game. Plus she's always whining that the mobile screen is too small."

"O well. 'Mario: 20,000 leagues under the sea' is out on mobile version. Wanna move on to that?"

"Sure…. You always seem to know what I want!" unexpectedly Bobby moved over and hugged Ray.

"Uhhh yea… I gotta go see my** girlfriend** Amara" and hurriedly moving out of Bobby's not so friendly hug, Ray practically ran from the room not once glancing back. Which didn't really matter since it was quite dark anyway.

"Damn Amara!"


End file.
